legalstep's Xanga

Monday, February 12, 2007

Mon, 12 Feb 2007 21:19:56 GMT

Reading old writing.

"I am two parts anger and fifteen parts tired."

"Breathing, thinking, feeling..... reeling."

Really takes me back, and pushes me forward, in a way. Two years ago is far away, and two years from now is just as far.

I think I'll just rest here awhile.

Friday, December 29, 2006

Fri, 29 Dec 2006 23:42:43 GMT

I will teach myself to draw.

The Frightening Power of the Church (or "How I Learned it was Never O.K. to Make a Mistake")

Sun, 03 Dec 2006 06:09:06 GMT

I recall it quite clearly.

The Korean United Methodist Church, that is. The image of that brick building is burned into my memory. It had a steeple; it had stained glass windows. It was a fairly typical Methodist church.

I went every Sunday from whenever it was I began to have coherent, linearly connected memories until I left Rochester, Michigan for Seoul, Korea. I, of course - being only 7 at the time - was sitting in the children's service with Pastor.... Kim? It was probably a Kim.

Dressed up in miniature corduroy pants with a miniature Polo shirt - my mom made sure to dress me properly for our visits to the house of the Lord - I sat with a bunch of less-impeccably dressed, but equally fidgety young Korean children, listening to a sermon about sin.

"When you sin, it's like squeezing a tube of toothpaste and having the toothpaste get everywhere. No amount of effort will get that toothpaste back into the tube. That's what sin is like. When you sin, there's nothing you can ever do to take it back."

What. Horror.

To be perfectly honest, I still get afraid whenever I think of that particular sermon.

There's nothing you can ever do to take it back.

I don't know where we go from there, but I know that I can't stay paralyzed by this fear forever.

Saturday, November 25, 2006

Sat, 25 Nov 2006 05:45:33 GMT

I packed up my regrets

Of what I said the other day

I know that it's too late

To undo the damage done

But for what it might be worth

I really am sorry, Laura

I didn't want to see

And I couldn't understand

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Wed, 15 Nov 2006 14:12:11 GMT

Hi Johan. I think you're the only one reading this:

I'm going to be in Korea this winter.

So.... Korea again.

I'm ready.

Saturday, November 04, 2006

Sat, 04 Nov 2006 21:23:30 GMT

Jesus, when did this damn thing get so complicated-looking?

New colors for a new day, for now.

Look out for "Lovely Sister Paradox," the hit new single coming to a store near you!

Thursday, September 14, 2006

Thu, 14 Sep 2006 17:25:16 GMT

Silence begets more silence
fosters resentment

Somewhere, a shot.
Silence

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

Wed, 16 Aug 2006 01:37:25 GMT

There are just some progressions that work.

Some progressions that work.

People have been playing the same chords for longer than you can imagine, you know. We just can't let ourselves get caught up in that.

Now, when we get out there, I'm going to need you to play, and I'm going to need you to do it without thinking about who's played the same chords in the same order before you, or about how much you look like you want to be some Big Star from fucking half a century ago. We're going to get out there, and I just want you to play.

Make me proud.

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

Wed, 08 Mar 2006 16:20:52 GMT

Today is the last day of classes. Tomorrow, and the day after are "reading period," which means I'll still end up going to some of my classes, but only to review for finals, which are next week.

I don't really know what else to tell you.

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Wed, 08 Feb 2006 05:00:06 GMT

God give us love in the time that we have.